Relationships Are Not Contracts


That’s what I sign up for in this relationship, babe.

When I heard that, I screamed JUST WHAT THE HELL. In my mind anyway. I’ve never been in a relationship and this isn’t about me. I heard that from a local show and things went mad. In my mind, again, anyway.

Even though I have no experience, I don’t think a person should put it that way. Yes, romantic relationships are formed through agreement, but it’s not a contract like the ones we sign before employment. You don’t put out a paper to sign up. It’s not a combination of the things both of you want or not. There are no clauses to address specific matters. No place or hours included, no salary or expenses. No expiry date.

And this is where things went madder. As I go through that contract thing, I could honestly point out too many analogies. There’s the name of the parties, which of course are the ones involved in the relationship. The job title becomes the label for your partner. The start date is the day the two of you agreed to be in a relationship, it’s the anniversary. Salary could be the rewards you gain from each other, whatever that is. Holidays could be the hard times, when you don’t wanna see him/her or when you’re having a cool off. Expenses cover the gift you give, your treats for your gf/bf, or even the time you spend together. Assessments are those instances when you fight and point out each other’s fault and shortcomings. And the clauses become the conditions and the things the two of you wanna change to make the relationship work better and last longer.

For a moment, I didn’t know what to believe in, what side to take. Or if I even need to favor one. But then I have to clear my mind and arrive to a definite ground. Coz that’s just how I like things to be. I certainly consider the fact that a relationship and an employment contract have a lot of things in common, if you look at it like the way I did. Still, I firmly stand that relationships of any kind is not a contract. Never was and never will be.

P.S. Why? You ask. Relationships are built with love and trust. That speaks true for some of us. But I will not delve into that. For one could create a whole new blog talking about just love or trust.


4 thoughts on “Relationships Are Not Contracts

  1. Your post makes very interesting reading Ruth, I agree with you totally a contract just sound very legal yet being in a relationship is not legal rather as I see it it is mutual agreement. You share same interest, to a certain degree you see things in the same way hence agreeing to be together for ever if you decide to get married. I guess for people who have loads of money the contract helps if things go pear shaped both parties interests are protected that is where the legal part come into play.
    It would be nice to just love each other and enjoy each other’s company without the legal part.


    1. Yes! You know I believe in marriage and it’s between the two of you. But then more and more people gets in the way to throw you things (sometimes they call it advice) that you don’t really need. Other’s perception or judgment or expectations out of marriage is really something. That’s what doesn’t make it work sometimes.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Interesting you say that Ruth, my marriage ended after eight years because of other people’s expectations. It took me eight to be able to express what I felt about the heartbreak and betrayal I experienced. I established another blog specifically to express my feelings. If you can spare the time I invite you to visit this other site and let me know what you think. Here is the bog address:-


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