Poetry

dormant feelings

Time will lead you back
to old conversations
long interpreted
to forced messages
accidentally deleted
to sweet words
never expressed.

Vaguely asking questions:
has the heart healed
is the love still there
did the pain go away
are feelings just dormant?

I hope in your mind the answers land.

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Strange

Love Love Love

I’ve read a really interesting article last month and it was To Fall In Love With Anyone, Do This. You might be raising your eyebrows now just like what I did when I first read the title but that’s completely normal and valid, especially for those of us who believe that romantic love doesn’t work that way. But I read it anyway; you know how curiosity works, right?

The writer, Ms. Catron, shared her experience on trying Dr. Arthur Aron’s study which was to make two strangers fall in love with just a series of questions. Although they didn’t really follow the procedures for the experiment, Ms. Catron and her partner fell in love and according to her:

Love didn’t happen to us. We’re in love because we each made the choice to be.

I was hesitant at first and didn’t want to read the 36 questions, but I looked into it anyway. They were divided into three sets, each one designed to reveal more about the person than the previous. After answering everything, the strangers have to stare into each other’s eyes for four minutes. Yes, four-super-long-minutes-that-feels-like-a-year to people who have just met. You wouldn’t even do that to a close friend unless it’s a dare or you have a reward after.

However, the weird thing is, I want to try it. I wanna try it even though I still believe that romantic love isn’t something that comes out of an experiment. Because love is an unexplainable thing, one that you can’t reason out. But I’m allowing myself to consider a small probability of falling in love to a stranger through an experiment. I just need someone who is also open to the idea. And I don’t think I will meet him any time this year. Or ever.

The quote mentioned above had me asking, does love happen or do we choose it?

A question I have yet to figure out.

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Bitter

Bruises

It’s funny how a simple sentence can make you feel bad. Typed or uttered. A conversation that was supposed to be fun and engaging suddenly punched your heart, making it heavy and bruise-friendly. Good thing is, bruises heal and last for only a while. It will not leave a mark and the impact is weak, as if the pain was barely there. It’s forgettable. And that’s just how I like it.

Bruises in my heart, like a foolish kind of happiness, make me think and question myself. Why was I bruised? Did I do something wrong? Am I too sensitive? (I’m not, believe me.) Or am just thinking that I’m the victim when it’s really the other way around?

Oh gosh it’s complicated.

What I also don’t get is how I accept these bruises, how I embrace them. Maybe because they push me to a better state than where I was aka becoming a better version of myself. Or maybe because being in pain, no matter how little that is, gives me strength and compels me to be more alive, or to live more in the way I want.

Yeah. I’m asking questions I already know the answers to. Coz I feel like it. Coz that’s what I wanna do right now, in my life. Sometimes, having a messy mind is fine. And I mean it when I say sometimes you know. And let me use this term today so as to end this post, sorrynotsorry.

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Poetry

Your Answer

girl-grunge-cigarette-tumblr

The first question is
if I believe in soulmates.
I don’t know.

The next question is
if I have a best friend.
And I don’t.

The last question is
if I want to have both.
Yes, I do.

The question I won’t ask is
could it (please, please) be you?
Your answer here.

This is in response to the Daily Post’s writing prompt Born to Be With You. [Photo]

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Strange

The Search Is On

You’re searching for something that is not hard to find. And yet you don’t see it.

Like happiness. And hope. Maybe someone who cares? Love? Or perhaps, a job. You keep thinking you’re alone. That some people are moving too fast you can’t keep up. You ask questions. Why do the others seem to get what they want easily? We’re not the same, yes, but it feels like everyone else has the things that you can’t get a hold of. You keep going. Because you have to. You keep looking. Because you want to.

They say love is just around the corner. The kind that makes your insides go wild. And they say hope is everywhere, just waiting for you to cling on to one. Happiness… ah, it never goes out of style. The people who care are left unnoticed. But they still remain, so appreciate them, accept them. And of course, the right job will come to you. Wait, is that it or you will find the right job instead? Oh I don’t know.

looking-for-something

I’m searching for something that is not hard to find. And yet I can’t see it. And yet I haven’t got a hold of it. But I keep going, because I have to. And I keep looking, because I want to.

[Photo]

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Sweet

Spread Love Challenge

This thing is hanging on the back of my mind for over a week now. And this is the only time I found to finish it. Realist Rebel nominated me for Spread Love Challenge and Mara Eastern made it an open nomination, so thank you guys!

The Rules

  • Write ten four word sentences about what love means to you.
  • Share your favorite quote on love.
  • Nominate ten other bloggers for the same.

Those are the rules but I broke the first one. Instead of ten, I got only up to five. And these are not from me. To really feel spreading love, I asked my friends what love means to them. And I’m surprised by how their answers differ from one other.

Love is lustful affection.

After asking what love means to him, he answered this right away. So you could say he never gave much thought to it. This could be a joke, or it could be real for him. But if you think about it, love actually has this side to it. Or not? I have no idea.

Love makes us alive.

This came from a late bloomer, as what my friends believe. And true enough, her eyes shine and her lips smile when she shares her stories with us. She’s happy and she’s lively and she feels more alive than the usual. I hope love is really like that.

Love is about trust.

Someone who has been in a lot of pain still believes that love is about trust. Or is this something she would want to see, feel, and experience after all that she’s been through? No matter what that is, I believe that trust is really very important.

Love sees no rules.

I used to be a sucker when it comes to forbidden love, but it lost its magic to me since I don’t know when. Maybe because it’s not as grand in real life as they show in the movies? Whatever. But I think rules are pathetic if it’s on love. I told that to my friend a hundred times, and she agreed to me a thousand. I think you could guess why.

Love makes everything bearable.

This one’s my favorite of all. I remember smiling after hearing this. It’s beautiful and it makes your heart light because you’re suddenly thinking of the future and the days that haven’t happened yet that could also be some of the best moments in our lives. Maybe this made you smile as well, and gave you a little more rope to continue holding on to.


It’s funny how all of them defined love in a way that reflects their own life. We know that love is not just about romance, but all of these were expressed with that in mind. I know all of them, and while giving their answers, I understand where they’re coming from. They all thought about love for a while (well except the first one) and as they contemplate on what to say to me, it’s like they’re also deciding and hoping that this is love, this should be love. I need not ask them why, or tell them to expound their answers. Because if I really have to give my own answer to this as well, even though I really find it hard, it’s this:

Love asks no questions.

Right after typing that, I asked Google if it is unique and original, but it turns out that William Shakespeare has said something similar. And that a certain Gerald Jampolsky said the exact same thing. So I guess it would help to quote them instead.

Love asks me no questions, and gives me endless support. —William Shakespeare

Love is the total absence of fear. Love asks no questions. Its natural state is one of extension and expansion, not comparison and measurement. —Gerald Jampolsky

The Nominees The High Heeled Paper Girl, Stumbling For Balance, The Fab Letters, xingsings, The Lone Rose

Here’s what you’re gonna do: write a ten four word sentences about love, sum it up with your favorite love quote, and nominate ten other bloggers. You could do anything about the rules as long as you spread love, coz it seems like I broke all of them.

I’m also making this an open nomination so anyone who’d like to participate could do so. Spread the love everyone!

P.S. This is also in response to the Daily Post’s writing prompt I Want to Know What Love Is.

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